September 2009
txtsfrmlstnght:
(303): I bet him anal if they won…the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
fmylife:
Today, I met my boyfriend’s father for the first time. We were at a restaurant and my bofriend kept playing footsie with me under the table. When my boyfriend excused himself to go to the restroom, the game of footsie was still going on. FML
Can't you see I'm Busy! - Home - Play at work... →
games
txtsfrmlstnght:
(951): I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words “quart of semen” in it
Reality Check, Please! | ThatsSoYummy.com →
Watch
The story of the Gömböc →
txtsfrmlstnght:
(812): She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don’t even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It’s what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
txtsfrmlstnght:
(812): She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don’t even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It’s what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
10 Dirty Little Restaurant Secrets - Slashfood →
WatchChinese reason for why the wedding ring is placed on the fourth finger.
“Today, I was teaching swimming lessons to a new group of kids. One kid came in...”
– mylifeisaverage.com
Well played indeed.
(via ryder) (via 60gritbeard)
1 tag
fmylife:
Today, I visited home. My drunk mother was screaming to my drunk stepdad about a fight four years ago. My little sister was looking in the mirror practicing her “Orgasm face.” And the neighbors were dancing outside coked out and naked. FML
txtsfrmlstnght:
(540): I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought… (1-540): You at least unplugged it right?
On a History test we were asked, "Who was...
paigeinwonderland:
http://mylifeisaverage.com
txtsfrmlstnght:
(602): im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
The mysterious equilibrium of zombies - The Boston... →
Planogram →
bestofwikipedia:
A planogram is a diagram of fixtures and products that illustrates how and where retail products should be displayed, usually on a store shelf in order to increase customer purchases. Planograms differ significantly by retail sector. Fast-moving consumer goods organizations and supermarkets largely use text and box based planograms that optimise shelf space, inventory turns, and...
txtsfrmlstnght:
(410): she called my cock the “semen sword” and then we invented a position called excalibur
